Club House Blues

"Our club is indeed open to new members, but I am afraid you sir are a big, fat, round peg and this is a small square hole. Good-day."

I Didn't Dig It

"Digging a tunnel? No, no, I was just erm... looking... for some loose change I dropped earlier. Yes, that's it, that's the completely believable and not at all suspicious thing I was doing just then."